Sometimes I won't listen to a band because I was told they werent worth listening to for reasons such as bad production, unoriginal lyrics, poor musicianship, and even if the lead vocalist's voice is annoying. And to be honest, sometimes I listen to an artist because I've heard great things about them or they are on the top hits of a good music site. Sometimes I'll go to a movie because I heard it's the best thing ever... Only to be disappointed because I believed what I heard and had it played up in my mind.
One of my favorite things to do is to listen to an artist or watch a movie without hearing anything about it. I love going with an open mind and all the surprises that comes with it. I find my favorite artists and movies through the unknown discovery.
There was this girl in my 3rd grade class who peed her pants. She stopped going to my school by the time she hit highschool, but she was always known as 'The girl who peed her pants in P.E.' The title stuck with her. That one act put a label that shadowed her other actions and her character in some of the minds of Miss McGuire's class.
I wonder why we label things. Maybe it's easy, helps wrap our minds around things, gives us a little control, or helps put things in a box. We label everything- things, places, people, behaviors, seasons, etc... I believe we also label ourselves.
Labels have the power to persuade.
We label things that are cautious.
We label things well what we want to promote.
We label things negatively the things that we are against.
And we also label things that of what we desire others, and maybe ourselves, to see it as.
Labels can limit.
Labels can cast shadows on the truth. I heard Christine Caine once say, "The more mild the label, the more potent the substance."
I came to Ukraine with so many labels about the people here. I thought about how they are recently out of Communism and the mindset towards working and living is, how the church has its roots in Eastern Orthodox theology and what differs with my belief, and how the people are cold, harsh, unwelcoming, and a possibly disgust for Westerners.
Since being here, I have come to find I was very wrong.I based my label on hearsay and on the few Ukrainians I met. I categorized all Ukrainians under a small label. People here in Rivne have been so welcoming and hospitable. People smile, offer assistance, initiate conversation, and insist we cut them in the train station toilet line.
They see life as more as a blossom booming rather than a means to survive.
There is hope. There is beauty. And the people see and find the beauty.
Here are a few things I find beautiful in Ukraine so far:
I've been served tea multiple times a day here. They serve tea with ornate cups as we share about our lives.
They have their own gardens with fresh fruit, veggies, and herbs. They toil the ground with their own hands.
The churches here have real gold on their domes. The design is unique and intricate.
Instead of a statue of a war hero, they have a statue of a poet. They honor a man that was known for the beautiful art of words.
Maybe it's the area we are at, but nonetheless the stereotype doesn't cover every person.
And there is a lot of need here...A lot. There Is hurt, broken, abandoned, forgotten, lost, and desperate people. But I know the hope of Christ and His light is greater than any darkness.
And the people of the Church here are all the more hopeful, joyful, and loving with Christ's love.
There is a lady here who takes in teenagers who are too old for an orphanage. Others have labeled them unwanted, unchangeable, and too hard. But she sees them, and therefore treats them, differently.
The children in the orphanage can be placed in the 'orphan' label. Or we can see her as Vika. *This is Vika, one of the girls at the orphanage. Vika can say in English, "What is your name?", and "My name is Vika." We had this conversation about 30 times yesterday.
I don't want to limit any person or put them in a box.
I want to walk into every conversation with an open, label-less heart about the other person.
The times I have it has been such a sweet, sweet blessing.
"Life is in the truth: the declarations that God speaks over us." My momma
This month was different than every other month for me on the race. Britt, Q, and I spent the month with our alumni squad leaders receiving training for this new role. After 4 months on the field with D squad, they have now gone home and we are the raised-up squad leaders.
The first video is about our training in becoming squad leaders. With all joking aside (the reaction to being asked to become squad leaders is pretty acurate), Britt, Q, and I feel empowered, encouraged, and ready for the next 7 months. We are called to minister to our squad so they can pour themselves out of a place of fullness into the nations. As we chase God's heart, we are chasing their hearts as they chase the hearts of each person they come into contact with.
The second video shows what D squad did here in Romania. I shared in my previous blog what the teams were a part of and now you can see glimpses of it.
I love Europe. Every country that I have gone to I feel that I leave a piece of my heart.
I have never been further than Germany until now. I didn’t know what to expect from Eastern Europe.
We left Honduras Friday morning, slept in JFK Friday night, walked around NYC Saturday, flew to Istanbul, and arrived in Bucharest late Sunday night. I finally got to my hostel at 4 a.m. I got sick the day before we left Honduras...Perfect timing.
The combination of travel, little sleep, and a change of weather didn’t help my physical condition. There were parts of the trip that I just wanted to cry because of how I felt. But even in the midst of not feeling well, I had an energy and excitement because I was in Europe.
Our squad spent the day in Bucharest.
I love this city. I love the history in Europe. I love the feeling I get walking around the streets. The rhythm of Europe makes my heart soar. I feel the oppression and weight of certain cities or countries here, but I feel hope stronger than the darkness. I didn’t get to spend too much time in Bucharest, but we will be back there next week for debrief.
I spent the first week here in Romania in the cutest town called Brasov. All the squad leaders took a 3 hour train ride to the city in the middle of Transylvania and surrounded by the snow-capped mountains. I read about the history of Brasov and it fascinates me how much history is in that area.
Britt, Q, and I were able to getaway with our squad leaders for training. We spent time enjoying everything: we saw Peles Castle, had a beautiful time building relationships, received amazing training, and sought God in a special way. Something cool I saw was an Eastern Orthodox Easter service at midnight. The service was traditional in a beautiful building but it saddened me. It was beautiful to hear people chanting prayers in a gorgeous language, the building was beautiful inside with such an ornate altar and the smell of incense all around, but all it was was tradition. It saddened me that this is some people’s only view of our relational, loving Father.
On Monday, Caitlin and I headed to Pitesti to visit 2 of the teams while Britt, Q, Mac, and Hope headed to Oradea to visit the other 3 teams.
Pitesti was different than the other places I’ve been to in Romania.
I saw more of the look of what I thought buildings influenced by Communism would look. The teams work with a ministry in an area called Razbouieni.This community is a low-income community known for violence and crime. One of the complexes houses a Gypsy community. Here, Christi and his ministry run a church, build relationships with the families, give love and affection to the kids, and help bridge relationships between the Gypsies and Romanians.
The teams placed here are involved with so much. They teach English, music, dance, and drama to the school in Razbouieni, play soccer with the neighbor kids, and will help next week with people caught in human trafficking.
-Alex was my little drum buddy
-Dan at the soccer field with some of the boys.
After an amazing week in Pitesti, Caitlin and I boarded an overnight train to Oradea.
Traveling is always an adventure in itself. There was a lot of laughing and awkward moments.
We arrived in Oradea Monday morning. Oradea is in the middle of the Romanian countryside.
The teams here live in a super nice hostel in the middle of a farm. The grass is so green, there are cows everywhere, and I love the open air all around. I was so excited to take a hot shower that had water pressure and a curtain! We are truly blessed to be staying in a place like this.
The teams here are partnered with an orphanage called Caminul Felix. This orphanage also has a dairy farm so we are surrounded by cows and fresh milk.
This month the team is helping build homes on the property of the orphanage. The kids live with a couple in homes to give more of a family feel rather than one huge compound with everyone. The teams are working on a home for a couple who foster 6 kids at the moment.
I love this new role and how I can be a part of so many ministry opportunities and so many teams.
Help me get the word out!
Financial Update:
I am $2,704.31 away from my last and final deadline! Please be in prayer so that my financial needs will be met so I can stay on the race. If you would like to donate, click the link on the left that says, “Support My Journey!”
I wrote a blog after month 1 about how I wanted to view ministry differently than I have in the past. I stated that I didn’t want to get into a compartmentalizing-mode and be unaware of the people in my life because I’m so focused on a ministry or ministry site. I always want to see with God’s eyes and see Him in the midst of everything.
I wanted this year to be about ministry. I wanted to focus on ministry to the hurt, broken, and lost. I wanted to go places I’ve never been. I wanted to go to places where people have never heard the name of Jesus. I wanted to live with people in their conditions, meet them where they are, and just love on them. I wanted to do The World Race. But what I wanted is only part of what I needed. I was praying prayers that God was answering in unexpected ways.
At the end of El Salvador, I was asked to be a team leader. I was honored, but in some ways didn’t expect or want the position. I wanted to do this year without a lot of responsibility. But I knew by the conversations I had with God that this was something He has laid out for me for this season.
So I spent month 3 leading Team LionSong.
At the end of month 3, I was asked to squad lead. When I was asked I was in complete shock. It was similar to my response to team leading, but on a bigger scale. I didn’t expect it. I didn’t even want it. I felt like this was too big of a task for me.
But when I spent time with God, I just felt like I need to keep my gaze on Him. All I need to focus on is just focussing on Him. I will lead by being fully led by Him. He will equip and will be strength, wisdom, peace, boldness, and rest.
Each and every time I need it.
I was also overwhelmed with the fact that one thing I’ve struggled with the most in my life was the feeling of being lost in the mix and misunderstood. The more I’ve strived, the more tired I got with coming up short. I’ve asked this year to be fully free of striving to prove myself to others. I finally got to a place that I don’t need to look for people’s approval. In this time when I’m free from the need to be noticed and understood, I’m called out to lead others.
The time I’ve spent wasting trying to prove something to others, my Father was smiling at me the whole time. I just missed it because I put a veil over His face by wanting others to see me. And it’s funny that when all I want and the only thing that matters is to fall more in love with Him and look for His approval, what I used to long for is right in front of me. This position is an honor for sure,but it hasn’t replaced my main focus of following after Christ like it has done in the past.
I’m in a season to lead confidently.
With squad leading my race has changed. My race is about the people on this squad. It is about the hearts of these people so they can reach their fullness in Christ and reach more people that are lost. My month will consist of visiting the teams. I will live with the teams like I am part of the team for the week.
So this month I get to be with these people.
They have led our squad in every way possible. They are such examples in my life of honor, love, grace, and passionate hearts after Jesus. They lead well because they pursue after God whole-heartedly. We have spent a few days on a retreat training and will spend this month side by side with them learning hands-on what it means to be a squad leader. I love how some of our training is them telling us our priority is our relationship with Jesus first and to be heart chasers. There isn’t an infinite to-do list or a no-fail policy. It is to live our lives after the One who loves us and do this position with Him.
Each person has spoken truth and life into my life countless times. I have big shoes to fill. But yet so released to be myself.
And my team for the race is these two amazing girls.
This is our first picture together.
These girls are stunning. Their pure, passionate, pursuing hearts after Christ makes me love them so much more. We spent time praying for what God wants this next season to look like. We each got unique things, but the common DNA was to follow wherever the Spirit leads. I am so honored and excited to do life with 2 girls who will blaze new paths with the Spirit and follow Him at all costs with joy and trust.
I am excited to do life with these girls, discover this new race that God has for us, lead the squad, travel, and enjoy our lives!
I had to surrender what my race will look like, and I’m surrendering it again. My ministry will be for the people in the country and for the people on my squad. It’s about discipleship. It’s about speaking into people about who they are in Christ, loving them, and seeing them with God’s eyes so they can tap more into God. It’s pushing people into more of their true selves- which means more into God. So if that’s my role...
I’m the 3rd of 6 kids. Whether at my house, a friend’s place, babysitting, or helping in the church nursery, little babies and kids were a part of my childhood.
Kids make me genuinely laugh. I love how kids are funny without trying. I love their complete abandonment. I love that games rarely get old. I love how the goofier you are, the more they laugh. I love how their style and personalities are so present at such a young age.
We get to work with a lot of kids on The Race. Through them, I have seen God’s father heart. I am reminded by Him that each person I’ve seen here has His heart like a father so taken by his child. Every person, noticed by me or not, has caught God’s gaze of love and affection.
I see His joy for His creation. I don’t think God has been bored with what He’s made. He has seen the sun rise and set since the beginning of time. He created with such intricate detail the earth, galaxies, stars, animals, people, and placed everything in its strategic place.
He created humanity in His image. Our life is for Him and also with Him. With the joy of a father, He listens to me say time and time again, “Dad, watch this!” And I feel Him being proud, smile, and encourage me like my earthly dad has done for me.
This month we are working with a couple named Tony and Nedia and they take in street kids. They are parents to the forgotten kids of the Honduran streets. Right now there are 9 boys living here with them. Some live at the compound, some come for a day, but all are accepted because they need a place where they can be a kid and feel loved.
With Tony and Nedia, they are able to catch a glimpse of God’s love for them. Tony talks about the boys with the biggest grin when they do well and with a loving but heavy heart when they choose their old life of hopelessness. He sees each boy with God’s eyes. He pours his heart, words of life, time, and love on them right where they are at. Sometimes it is returned, sometimes rejected.
Each kid is searching for a place to belong.
Matthew 18:3
And He said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Our team crafted a team prayer that we read together every morning. One line we put in the prayer is that as a team we want child-like faith, hope, and love. I’m rediscovering what does it mean to me to live in child-like faith, hope, love.
We are in our 3rd month and I have learned so much from the kids I have encountered.
I’ve seen that kids.....
1. Never lose wonderment. They are amazed and say ‘again and again’ when I say, “I’ve seen that,” or “unoriginal,” or “not impressed.”
photo: by Robin Quinn Brooks
2. Watch you. Their eyes are zeroed in. Their attention is solely on you. They may not copy everything you do, but they watch everything.
Photo: Robin Quinn Brooks
3. Mimic. As the kids watch, they will do what you do. They will try to mimic every gesture, action, and word.
Photo: By Robin Quinn Brooks Photo: By Robin Quinn Brooks
4. Hold on to you. They don’t say, “Are you sure you can you hold me?” “Will you drop me?” No, they leap into your arms. They sit in your lap until your leg falls asleep. They will put their dirty hands and snot-filled faces all over yours.They will hold onto you until you let go.
With God, I want to...
1. Never lose wonderment. I don’t want to lose the beauty and awe of His creation, His people, and daily walking through life with Him.
2. Watch Him. I want my eyes so focused on Jesus that everything else fades away.
3. Mimic Him. With my eyes set on my Father, I want to mimic every thought, action, and word.
4. Hold on to Him. I want to hold on to God with complete trust and rest as much in the good times as in the tough times.
There are things I need to mature in and things I need to re-learn to be like a child.
This is Team Lionsong's recap of our 2nd month on the race. We lived in Santa Tecla, El Salvador, but traveled all around the country for ministry.
We were involved with school programs, orphanages, church plants, kids ministry, home visits, working at a senior shelter, and anything else they asked us to do this month. It was just the 6 of us this month and we have grown as a family and team. This video is a glimpse of our month.
I love hymns. I can talk for hours about why I love the stories and doctrine behind the words written. There is great new music out there and I have my share of listening, but there is something about the seasoned words in hymns that I always want to keep near.
Some people are shocked that hymns are my go-to worship music because I am in my 20‘s and a musician. Some identify hymns with old books and stale religion. People have made it so, not the words.
This love for hymns came about because my mother was a hymnal nerd. Growing up riding in the car with my mom, we either listened to amazing 60’s and 70’s music or hymns. We even had a book with all the back stories of why the hymns were written.
I brought one book (other than my Bible) with me on the race. I wanted a book that I could study for the year and would be my prayer through the Race. But I couldn’t decide.
Right before Christmas, my mom and I went to the bookstore to grab books for my family’s Christmas stockings. We both are book nerds when it comes to authors like A. W.Tozer (If you do not know who this man is, then YOU NEED TO). I found a book I haven’t read yet by him called ‘The Crucified Life.’ When I grabbed it, my mom came over, took it from my hands, and bought it for herself. She didn’t want to wait until Christmas to begin reading.
After she finished the book around Christmas, she gave it to me to read before I would leave. After the introduction, I knew it was the book I needed to bring on my trip as a challenge to walk out Galations 2:20 and all that it holds. To put it shortly, this book has transformed me. It is a difficult message. The words challenge my motives and actions. It was not a fun book to read, and definitely not a holiday book on the beach, but it was what I needed to prepare and propel my heart for what this year holds.
One thing I love what Tozer in this book is he finishes every chapter with a hymn. He says, “The Christian hymnal is one of the great depositories of the Christian life and experience. The men and women behind these hymns were writing out of deep spiritual experiences. The hymnal connects us with our Christian heritage.”
Hymnal writers put theology in their words. And I love it because it’s used with the power of music! Put theology to a tune and you can be singing truth all day long. And these Christian forefathers didn’t write these words because it sounded pretty, but rather out of declaring what is true in the midst of trouble. Read any story as to why a hymn was written and you will find trials, pain, loneliness, and heartache-- all things we all identify with through every generation. But in the midst of being broken, they choose to sing words of adoration and praise to God and leave the songs to teach us. These words are tried and true and point us to recognize and proclaim the character and wonderment of God.
This is my hymn for today.
Not I, But Christ
Frances E. Bolton (d.1926)
Not I, but Christ, be honored, loved, exalted;
Not I, but Christ, be seen be known, be heard;
Not I, but Christ, in every look and action,
Not I, but Christ, in every thought and word.
Not I, but Christ, to gently soothe in sorrow,
Not I, but Christ, to wipe the falling tear;
Not I, but Christ, to lift the weary burden,
Not I, but Christ, to hush away all fear.
Christ, only Christ! no idle words e’er falling,
Christ, only Christ; no needless bustling sound;
Christ, only Christ; no self important bearing;
Christ, only Christ; no trace of “I” be found.
Not I, but Christ, my every need supplying,
Not I, but Christ, my strength and health to be;
Not I, but Christ, for body, soul, and spirit,
Christ, only Christ, here and eternally.
Team Lion Song: Chase, Robin, Mark, Dani, Hayden, and me. We were strangers in October but with kindred spirits. It’s amazing to see what God has done in just a few months. This is not only my team, but my family. We begin, walk out, and end each day together--24/7. Each one of these people are so unique and bring God in my life in a new way. I’ve experienced true friendship here. We do bible studies together, minister, preach, worship, pray for others, share our struggles and life stories, edify and encourage one another, and laugh and goof off. It’s friendships of laughter and of depth. I’m encouraged and challenged by each friend I’ve made here on my team and squad. I feel loved by each of them, free to be my true self, and challenged to be all who God has called me to be.
The bathroom is an adventure on the World Race. It could be a toilet, bush, a cement seat over a pit, or just a hole in the ground. A challenging part is to remember that toilet paper is not allowed in the toilets.
Between our travel from Guatemala and to our next site in El Salvador, 3 teams from our squad along with our squad leaders met at Playa El Sunzal, El Salvador. We had about 2 days to rest and enjoy some time together before we parted ways. The scenery was stunning! One night we climbed a cliff to watch the sunset and worship together while overlooking the ocean.
I love and hate going to the orphanage. I love the kids we have met and how we can pour all our love out on each child. But I hate leaving them. This little girl, Angeline, stole my heart. She has the biggest smile and the best laugh...but she will make you work for it.
This month it is just our team living together, but last month we were partnered with Team Cherished. I’m seeing what it means to truly live in community with brothers and sisters in Christ. This picture was taken on our last day in Guatemala in front of our house.
This lady came up to us while we were doing some worship outside city hall. She asked for prayer and so we gathered around her. I loved her boldness to ask for prayer and was challenged by it. I’m challenged to live, speak, and pray boldly at all times. A.W. Tozer says of David, "He put himself in such a position that if God did not come though, everything would be lost." I desire to live like David lived. I want to live in a place of no trust in myself and perfect trust in God.
We have the privilege to go to areas such as the city dump. Here we played music, performed dramas, shared the gospel, played with kids, and talked with the adults. These kids usually stop going to school by the age of 11 so they can help support their families by digging through the city’s trash and collect anything recyclable. This is their home, work, and playground. The atmosphere at first felt hopeless. But we can bring light and love the forgotten.
I have never seen so many parks in my life. It’s a great place to begin to build relationships. We would go there to play sports, music, and hang out with the people. There were some dancers there that I felt never left the park. They taught us some dance moves and we taught them some music.
We also get to go into schools. We do a program of games, music, dramas, share our testimonies, teach English, and preach. We work with ages from 5-17. This picture was at a special needs school in Guatemala. This is Sandra. She loved to be tossed in the air, spun around, and hung upside down. One game she loved and we played OVER AND OVER was for her to ‘hit’ me on the swing. I would stand in front of the swing and when she got really high, her feet would hit me and knock me on the ground. It never got old...to her. I felt sore the next day.
We get to experience the culture by living with host families. This month we are living with Guadeloupe, but we call her Mamma ‘Lupe. She treats us like her own grandkids. She is so proud of her country and takes us all around to give us glimpses of the El Salvadorean culture. She has taught us how to hand wash our clothes and make the traditional Papoosas.
This month we live and work with people who do not speak English. Many things get lost in translation. We could choose to either be frustrated or trust God and be open to the surprises and unexpected opportunities.
Here is an example: One day we were told to bring our swimsuits because in the afternoon we will take some of the elderly people from the senior shelter to the pool for hydrotherapy. We realized when we got to the pool that this was not the case. We were at a waterpark. Since we are ‘Gringos,’ we attract a lot of attention. We had the best time at ‘hydrotherapy.’ We have many examples of times we find out last minute that we need to share a message or teach an English song or do a drama. This kind of life keeps us on our toes and relying on God. Can’t wait for the next surprise!
We usually don’t know how we will get around town. Sometimes we walk and sometimes it’s a questionable form of transport. In Guatemala it was a ‘70s panel van. This month it is a back of a truck. It may not be the safest, but we get the best view while seeing the city, mountains, lakes, and volcanoes!
This month we spend some time at a senior shelter. This shelter is for the elderly who are thrown out onto the street when their families don’t want to take care of them. We clean the rooms, bathrooms, outside, dining room, and family room. We also help serve them their meals, play bingo with them (I guess this is the universal elderly game), and even dance with them.
At the shelter we also get to spend time with the residents. It’s sometime a challenge when we don’t speak the same language, so sometimes it’s a conversation or just sitting with them. This is Rosa with my teammate Robin. Rosa knits hats and loves to talk to us. She lets us know what is good to eat at lunch or to 'save' to feed for the birds.
Everyday in Guatemala before dinner, a few of us girls would walk over to the neighbor’s house for soccer. We also went on walks with them around the neighborhood, had dance parties, and talked with their families. At the end we were able to bless them with a real soccer ball, have a goodbye party, and pray with kids and Kendra’s mother. They were such a blessing to me. I miss those faces. Please excuse my crazy hair...It’s hot and humid. Be jealous....
We get the opportunity to go into hospitals and share the Gospel as well as pray for the sick. This picture was in the NICU. This little baby boy was 4 days old and nameless. I didn’t preach, but got to pray for him, his family, and show love to him and the nurses. The time is now for bold prayers to our God that is Healer.
This is Mark preaching and Chase translating at a church. Some churches are grand while some are an open shed in the middle of the neighborhood, but all proclaim that Jesus is Lord. We have the opportunity to share our testimonies, lead worship, pray for people, and preach sermons at these churches.
Our team split up into pairs for an afternoon to visit different families in a community near San Vicente. We are welcomed into their homes and spend time talking with them, playing with the kids, sharing meals together, and praying with them. It astounds me how people open their lives to us.
I love what we have done, are doing, and will be doing. I’m not sure what the other months will look like, but I’m excited.
Last month was incredible to say the least. But I want it to be the foundation to build upon. I am asking God to do 2 things in me this month.
The first is a heart expansion.
Sometimes my mind imagines things way different than how they actually turn out to be.
It sounds all amazing back in the states to be a part of missions, help the orphans, minister to ladies working at the bar, teach English, help church plants, serve the homeless, love the unloved, etc.., but it’s another story when labels and numbers stop being that and you see them as a person. Reality kicked in last month.
I love what I’m doing, but it hurts. It hurts to see that this is their lives, but for me it’s only a month. It’s hard to hold Angeline at the orphanage who has the most outgoing personality already, but like the other kids, is dirty and neglected, and after giving all my love for a couple hours each week, I had to put her back in her bed while she cries.
It hurts to build great relationships with a neighbor family only to leave in a month. It hurts to go into the hospital and hold a baby who is battling Hepatitis C.
And it hurts to do ministry when I’m tired, spent, or not in the mood.
When I think about all this, doubt creeps in and makes me wonder if what I’m doing is really helpful. What I mean is that I loved building a great relationship with the neighbors, but part of me wonders how helpful it is when they cry when we leave. Does it help to get a baby used to being held and then not come back?
I know it’s a lie and I don’t act on it, but it’s a struggle in my mind to not let walls be built up. I don’t want to NOT give of myself to make goodbye easier because that’s not worth it. Even if it’s a short period, people need to be fully valued.
I have to remind myself to trust. I know God is so in love with them and I’m playing just a part into this story. It’s a humbling honor. I know He will reveal Himself either through others to come or another way because He can’t be boxed in and works in mysterious ways. It still blows my mind that He chooses to use us.
My mom tells me, ‘Do all that you can do and trust God with the rest.’ I can invest all I can and then leave it in God’s hands knowing that I was fully used by Him.
But it still doesn’t make it easier to leave. Maybe it’s good sign that it’s hard because that mean investments were made.
Our purpose is to know Him and make Him known. But like A.W. Tozer says, “The glory of God always comes at the sacrifice of self.” I pray that I will live by this and not miss out on all that God wants me to be and do because I wanted to save part of myself. The only thing that will hinder Him is me.
So my prayer this month is that my heart will be expanded so I can love more, give more, and serve more.
Another prayer is to BE and not just DO.
This came about from a conversation with my neighbor Catie. Last week, Jill and I went over to play soccer with the kids and we began talking to the mother Catie. I asked if there are a lot of white people that come here. She said she sees a lot but no one has ever talked, befriended, or helped them.
That messed me up and opened my eyes.
I don’t want to just DO ministry.
Please hear me and know I’m not hating on the others that have come before. We are building on top of the foundations they have laid!
Ministry can be a job/title, lifestyle, or both. I’m talking about the lifestyle that all Christians are called to. Ministry shouldn’t be something we just ‘do.’ It should be a part of us.
It’s so easy to ‘do’ ministry and then when we want to be done we can check out.
I noticed how I would get in the van, do whatever ministry is there, and then come home and want to wind down. (I am not talking about the balance in life and the need to rest, I’m talking about the heart posture of what IS ministry.) But what about my home? My teammates? My host family? My neighbors? Catie listened to us sing worship on the radio. She sees us daily and then hears us on the radio. I pray my actions match up with the God I sing about.
I have been given such a great example because of my parents showed me their ministry as a lifestyle in their individual lives, jobs, friends, relationship to each other, and to my siblings and me.
I want Him to overflow all the time from me. I don’t want this ministry to be just a year of my life given to the label ‘missionary.’ Ministry is all around-- with my family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, strangers, and those surrounding me inside and outside the house.
Ministry doesn’t stop in an action; it’s a state because it is with who we interact with.
